So many goodbyes...

As a kid with a full house of siblings I believed I was the luckiest girl in the world. Someone was always home in our house on the hill. and when the humans were out, there was always a dog there to love on. But as the youngest of nine, I watched all those siblings move onto colleges, marriages, and all the many milestones to achieve. There were so many goodbyes. And I never got used to. them, just through them. And now as a mom and the crazy dog walking, dog fostering, three dog having lady. there are still many changes and milestones all over the place that often call for a long or sad goodbye. Does that make me more resilient in a way? Uh, ya think it would. But nope, it just makes me more of a hot-mascara- crying -mess and often feeling very heartbroken.

I know we are still in a pandemic and I'm very fortunate I haven't lost loved ones due to Covid. But there's been so many changes and loss in other ways. Also just carrying in my heart and psyche a collective empathy for everyone impacted by the varied losses Covid brought/brings.

But yesterday I said a big goodbye to Bodie and Winston, two good boys :

that put me on the road to walking dogs professionally five years ago. And today the heart is heavy and eyes puffy. These two and their owners have been a huge, bright spot in my life. We had many walks along the bay, hills, and streets. They'd bring many smiles to others passing by, with their underbites alone. But people would also often laugh at their stubbornness and funny antics, like eating hot garbage and giving side eye. We just had our last walk before they jumped into their car and onto roadtripping and adventuring to their new home in North Carolina. And I'll miss them like crazy, but very. grateful for having spent such a good slobbery chunk of time with them. And oh yes, I will go to North Carolina,, I will visit. I have to,

Then there's the other many goodbyes: rainbow bridge ones hit the heart hard, where I ask myself if I can stay in this dog life...this year I lost Bosco, our own crazy Boston Terrier that was also hugely cuddly, funny and stubborn. And then Baileys (see my senior dog blog post) he was a sassy senior with the most incredible snuggly face. And a sweet owner that I'll feel forever connected to.. Also my besties moved to LA, with their two girl pups that I adore and miss!

But with all these goodbyes, I say hello to foster pups that bring more laughs, cuddles and yes, another opportunity to say goodbye, but in the best way possible...by giving them a happy healthy start. And once again, as they move on, I'll be a ugly cry mess ( why do I not invest in a good waterproof mascara?) But with more pawprints that have trampled upon my heart. And how can I not be ultimately grateful for this dog life? Heartbreak, puffy eyes and all.